{"id":927,"date":"2025-11-16T23:26:16","date_gmt":"2025-11-16T23:26:16","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.pasioncondal.com\/blog\/?p=927"},"modified":"2025-11-16T23:33:33","modified_gmt":"2025-11-16T23:33:33","slug":"tartiflettes-log-big-scary-things-go-bye-bye","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.pasioncondal.com\/blog\/tartiflettes-log-big-scary-things-go-bye-bye\/","title":{"rendered":"Tartiflette\u2019s Log: \u201cBig Scary Things Go Bye-Bye\u201d"},"content":{"rendered":"\t\t
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Filed under: Important Mission Things<\/em>
Time: Morning-ish. Or snack o\u2019clock.<\/em><\/p>\n\n

Dictated to Luna while dangling from a rubber bat<\/em><\/p>\n

\n

\"\"I waked up and Karen was doing The Faces.<\/strong>
Not the happy ones. The owwie ones.
So I followed her. I is helpful. I supervise.<\/p>\n\n

She open The Closet. The Closet of Wonders and Screams.<\/em>
There are bins. There are bags. There are Things With Eyes.
I LOVES IT.<\/p>\n\n

So I:<\/p>\n

– Climbed inside a bin. Sat on a ghost. Ghost went \u201cmeh.\u201d<\/p>\n

– Stole a skeleton hand. Now is my hand.<\/p>\n

– Chewed a fake spider leg. Tasted crunchy like victory.<\/p>\n

– Rolled in a pile of gauze. Karen said \u201cTARTI NO\u201d but I say \u201cTARTI YES.\u201d<\/p>\n\n

Then I saw The Big Tall Skellington.
He was looking at my Karen with his hollowy eyes. So I YELLED at him.
\u201cHEY! YOU GET OFF MY KAREN!\u201d
Then I launched.
Missed.
Landed in a bowl of glitter eyeballs. Still counts as bravery.<\/p>\n\n

Karen moved slow today. Her back said \u201csnap crackle nope.\u201d<\/em>
So I stayed close. Sat on her foot. Looked very small and brave.
When she bendy to pick up spooky clown head, I jumped in her hoodie pocket.
That\u2019s called tactical support.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n

Later, I made a new friend. A plastic crow. His name is Stabby.<\/em>
I love him.<\/p>\n\n

Then I helped by pushing one whole bin down the hall.
Okay, I was inside it. But gravity helped,<\/em> and gravity is my friend.<\/p>\n

\n

THINGS I DID THAT WERE HELPFUL:<\/h2>\n

– Yelled at ghosts.<\/span><\/p>\n

– Licked Karen\u2019s elbow.<\/span><\/p>\n

– Sat on a fog machine.<\/span><\/p>\n

– Got stuck inside a witch hat (again).<\/span><\/p>\n

– Wore it like a cape (very heroic).<\/span><\/p>\n

– Fell asleep in the wreath bin. Snored like a champion.<\/span><\/p>\n

\n

THINGS I PLAN TO DO TOMORROW:<\/h2>\n

– Fight inflatable spider. Win.<\/span><\/p>\n

– Put pumpkin in Collateral Damage’s shoe.<\/span><\/p>\n

– Eat one string of cobweb. Only one (maybe two).<\/span><\/p>\n

– Help with tape gun. Mostly lick it.<\/span><\/p>\n

\n

\"\"This house is my kingdom.<\/strong>
Karen is the queen.<\/strong>
I am her goblin knight. I will defend her from boxes and skeletons and sadness and all the mean things.<\/p>\n\n

Also if I find the glitter again I will eat it.
That is my solemn vow.<\/p>\n\n

\ud83d\udc3e \u2013 Tartiflette, Chaos Intern and Bombardeo Volunteer<\/em><\/p>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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