{"id":1081,"date":"2026-02-08T02:39:08","date_gmt":"2026-02-08T02:39:08","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.pasioncondal.com\/blog\/?p=1081"},"modified":"2026-02-19T02:40:17","modified_gmt":"2026-02-19T02:40:17","slug":"luna-attempts-dino-pedagogy-a-tragedy-2-3","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.pasioncondal.com\/blog\/luna-attempts-dino-pedagogy-a-tragedy-2-3\/","title":{"rendered":"Luna attempts dino pedagogy (a tragedy) 2\/3"},"content":{"rendered":"\t\t
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Coldbound and the cats still with the bloody dinosaurs…<\/p>\n\n

(A small head pops up again from behind the couch.)<\/p>\n\n

Tartiflette<\/strong>: I WOULD HAVE BEEN A DINOSAUR PRINCESS AND YOU WOULD HAVE TO LISTEN TO ME.<\/p>\n\n

Charlotte, Lilith, Luna and even Ziggy <\/strong>(simultaneously<\/em>): NO.<\/p>\n\n

Tartiflette<\/strong> (cheerful, unhinged<\/em>): KAREN WOULD BE A MAIASAURA BECAUSE SHE PICKS ME UP WRONG BUT SHE LOVES ME.<\/p>\n\n

Charlotte<\/strong> (exhales, defeated<\/em>):\u2026Bastet help us.<\/p>\n\n

\"\"Karen<\/strong> (carrying Princess Tartirexy, a tiny kitten tyrannosaurus wrapped in a blanket, making soft rawr noises<\/em>): I\u2019ve decided that I am a Maiasaura. And this (lifts Tartiflette like Simba) is my baby princess Tartirexy. Who\u2019s my little T-rex? Yes you are! Fearsome princess!<\/p>\n\n

Tartirexy<\/strong>: rawr!<\/p>\n\n

Luna<\/strong>: We\u2019re doomed.<\/p>\n\n

Charlotte<\/strong>: Karen is not a parent, she is an enabler with two opposable thumbs.<\/p>\n\n

Tartirexy<\/strong> (biting Charlotte\u2019s tail): I ATTACK THE OLD QUEEN.<\/p>\n\n

Charlotte<\/strong> (yelps<\/em>): TE VOY A PARTIR LA MANDARINA EN GAJOS!!!!<\/p>\n\n

Luna<\/strong>: No citrus based threats!!!!<\/p>\n\n

Karen<\/strong> (hugging THE baby tighter<\/em>): She\u2019s just expressing herself.<\/p>\n\n

Luna<\/strong> (aside<\/em>): She\u2019s expressing murder.<\/p>\n\n

(Suddenly, another crash, something has fallen again<\/em>.)<\/p>\n\n

Tartirexy<\/strong> (mouth full of something important<\/em>): METEOR HIT. I WIN.<\/p>\n\n

Charlotte<\/strong> (closing eyes<\/em>): I cannot live in the Cretaceous with this monster.<\/p>\n\n

Luna<\/strong> (sighs<\/em>): Too late. The era has begun.<\/p>\n\n

Karen<\/strong> (raising Tartirexy triumphantly<\/em>): RAWR.<\/p>\n\n

Tartirexy<\/strong>: RAWR BUT LOUDER.<\/p>\n\n

THE AGE OF TARTIREXY<\/strong><\/p>\n\n

Luna<\/strong> (setting up a command center on the dining table<\/em>): I\u2019m documenting everything because future generations will need to know how civilization collapsed.<\/p>\n\n

\"\"Charlotte<\/strong>\ud83d\ude41standing on the arm of the couch<\/em>): Good. Start with this: it is all Karen\u2019s fault because she is an ENABLER<\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n

Karen<\/strong> (on the couch, holding Tartirexy upside down<\/em>): She\u2019s not indulged. She\u2019s cherished.<\/p>\n\n

Tartirexy<\/strong> (chewing Karen\u2019s hair<\/em>): I EAT THE QUEEN\u2019S MANE.<\/p>\n\n

Charlotte<\/strong> (horrified<\/em>): she is a pill.<\/p>\n\n

Karen<\/strong>: She\u2019s a princess.<\/p>\n\n

Charlotte<\/strong> (snaps<\/em>): Princesses are trained! They learn restraint! They do NOT scream at lamps!<\/p>\n\n

Tartirexy<\/strong> (charging a lamp<\/em>): I HATE THE SUN EGG. (CRASH.)<\/p>\n\n

Luna<\/strong> (scribbling<\/em>): First casualty: Lighting, how appropriate.<\/p>\n\n

(Tartirexy stirs, stretches one tiny paw, sighs<\/em>.)<\/p>\n\n

Charlotte<\/strong>: LOOK AT HER, LOOK AT HER!!!. LOOK AT THAT STRETCH!!! THAT IS THE STRETCH OF SOMEONE WHO EXPECTS ROOM SERVICE!!!.<\/p>\n\n

Luna<\/strong>: She does appear\u2026 confident.<\/p>\n\n

Charlotte<\/strong>: CONFIDENT BECAUSE SHE HAS BEEN ENABLED BY A WOMAN WHO CALLS HER \u201cPRINCESS\u201d AND ME \u201cDRAMATIC\u201d<\/p>\n\n

(turns on Karen<\/em>): You\u2019ve created a monster.<\/p>\n\n

Ziggy<\/strong> (yawning<\/em>): Wake me when the screaming stops. (It never will.)<\/p>\n\n

Charlotte<\/strong> (lower voice, dangerous<\/em>): This ends now. I\u2019m forming a resistance.<\/p>\n\n

Luna<\/strong> (looks up<\/em>): You already tried that during the Great Laser Pointer Incident.<\/p>\n\n

Charlotte<\/strong>: That was sabotage. I will NOT live under the rule of a toddler dinosaur.<\/p>\n\n

Tartirexy<\/strong> (launches herself directly at Charlotte<\/em>): I RULE YOU FIRST!.<\/p>\n\n

(Charlotte dodges. Barely<\/em>.)<\/p>\n\n

(Lilith appears silently, yellow e<\/em>yes glowing.)<\/p>\n\n

Lilith<\/strong> (serene<\/em>): The prophecy is fulfilled.<\/p>\n\n

Charlotte<\/strong>: Oh look, the clown that the circus lost just walked in. WHAT PROPHECY?<\/p>\n\n

Lilith<\/strong>: The Small One Who Breaks Everything.<\/p>\n\n

(Tartirexy knocks over a water glass<\/em>.)<\/p>\n\n

Tartirexy<\/strong> (snuggling into Karen\u2019s neck, suddenly sleepy<\/em>): I NAP NOW. RULE LATER.<\/p>\n\n

(She passes out instantly.)<\/em><\/p>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t\t\t<\/div>\n\t\t","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Coldbound and the cats still with the bloody dinosaurs… (A small head pops up again…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":1086,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[26,251,28,31],"tags":[458,112,54,81,46,453,50,383,229,484,168,38,114,365,271,373,455,459,48,462],"class_list":["post-1081","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-catchats","category-general-kerfuffles","category-lunaslogs","category-tartifletteszoomies","tag-absurd-comedy","tag-cat-blog","tag-cat-humor","tag-catopia-adventures","tag-cats-of-hiss-and-tell","tag-chaos-goblin","tag-charlotte","tag-comedic-blog","tag-comedy","tag-dinosaurs","tag-feline-storytelling","tag-funny-cat-blog","tag-funny-cat-tales","tag-funny-cats","tag-hiss-and-tell","tag-hiss-and-tell-series","tag-luna-reports","tag-pet-shenanigans","tag-tartiflette-2","tag-veterinary-parody"],"aioseo_notices":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/www.pasioncondal.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/02\/Tarti-dino-2.webp","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.pasioncondal.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1081","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.pasioncondal.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.pasioncondal.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.pasioncondal.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.pasioncondal.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1081"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/www.pasioncondal.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1081\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1090,"href":"https:\/\/www.pasioncondal.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1081\/revisions\/1090"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.pasioncondal.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/1086"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.pasioncondal.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1081"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.pasioncondal.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1081"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.pasioncondal.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1081"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}