Maybe a big oopsie. Maybe a two-fern funeral-sized oopsie.
See, I was being a very good girl. I was sittin’ on da shelf. AND DEN—A BIRDIE HAPPENED. IN. THE. WINDOW. It flapped its flappy flaps and yelled chirpy swears at me and I was like “AAAAAHHHHH'”. So I jumped… like, emergency-mega-zoomies jump… and..well.
The ferns didn’t make it.
One fell like a leaf in autumn. The other exploded like salad confetti. I swear dey screamed. I heard it.
I sowwy, plants. I didn’t mean it. You was leafy and innocent. But I panicked in my toes.
Anyway, I would like diplomatic immunity (is dat what you said, Luna?) because I’m smol and have toe beans. Also I give kisses and purr like a microwave, so dat should count for somethin’.
RIP Ferns. Gone but not forgotten.
Love,
Tarti
P.S. The bird is still out dere. He knows what he did.
P.S. This is the Karen, the fern and the begonia are OK, the pots not so much.
