By Tarti (a.k.a. Arseniflette Lupin)
Proud Minion in Training of Charlotte, Mastermind of Catopia
Hi hi! It’s me, Tarti!
But mama calls me Arseniflette Lupin sometimes. (Charlotte sez I’m always Arseniflette, but she’s just grumpy ‘cause she don’t have secret stashes like me. So there.)
I’m da bestest shopper in da whole house! I go shoppin’ all day long. What do I buy? Um…
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- Socks
-
- Pens
-
- Screwz
-
- Bottle caps
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- Earbuds (SO chewy!)
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- And sometimes da shiny, rattly stuff mama calls
- “jewelry.”
I don’t know what jewelry is, but it makes the prettiest noises when I smack it to da floor—tap tap!
Once it’s mine (ALL mine!!), I take it to my SECRET HIDIN’ PLACES.
Where are dey?
Not tellin’!
Only Bruno and I know!!!!
Mama can’t find dem, and Charlotte’s not telling.
She just calls me “a lil’ thief” and says I’m gonna end up on da “kitty most wanted list.”
One time Mama caught me wif a big shiny thingy she calls an “e-ring” in my mouth, an’ she said,
“Tarti, give it back!”
But NOPE.
I hide things in ma mouth an’ run away wif them. Zoom zoom!
She chased me, but I’m faster! Hehehehe.
Charlotte got all huffy an’ said,
“Arseniflette, you’re an embarrassment to Catopia!”
…but then she muttered sumfin’ about me bein’ a “promisin’ jewel thief apprentice minion,” so… maybe she’s proud of me?
Sorta?
And Willow just gave me her “oh dear” look.
I fink dat means she loves me, too.
I brig her things sometimes becos she nice.
Anyway, gotta go now!
I saw Mama’s glasses on da table an’ dey look like a NEW FAVORITE THING.
Wish me luck on my next shoppin’ spree!
Signed,
Arseniflette da Stealthiest Shopper
(Proud minion in training of Charlotte, Mastermind of Catopia)
